Thursday, September 14, 2006


Today was a rough day. Ever since things got really going, I've been feeling like there is not nearly enough time everyday. Today was no exception. I run hectically from one thing to another, am late to half of them, and feel like in one way or another I letting everyone down. I feel like a bad TA (they didn't finish their lab today), a bad researcher (I missed a meeting, cuz I was TA-ing), a bad student (I was too busy to print out the lecture notes), a bad friend (I can't go to a wedding in Sacramento), and bad girlfriend (because I bitch about all this to a certain someone).

So there was NO day like today to receive the BEST care package EVER from the BEST SISTER EVER. Emily is the pinnacle of style, charm, and grace. She always exceeds every standard for kindness and social graces. There is a lot of our Grandmother in her. I opened my first of the adorably wrapped packages (it is going to be SO hard to ration them, but I am sure I will have many more rough days to come) and was was given the perfect quote to reassure me after today (and yummy sample of Philosophy's Amazing Grace:

"how you climb up the mountain is just as important as how you get down the mountain. and, so it is with life, which for many of us becomes one gigantic test followed by one gigantic lesson. in the end, it all comes down to one word. grace. it's how you accept winning and losing, good luck and bad luck, the darkness and the light."

And with a long hot shower I realized that the challenging parts in life are even more important than the easy ones, and how I deal with this year will depend on my grace. So I went on eBay and bought a big bottle. And whenever I use it I will think of my best inspiration for grace.

(I also got the Purity face wash, I love eBay!)

Reality Check: I am not failing out of gradschool, no worries. I am just learning that I need to learn how to manage my time and how to say no. I have some wonderful new friends, my students are great and learning a lot, and my prof said my brain sections were some of the best she'd ever seen. And tonight Bubs got me and two girlfriends free tickets to the new Jason Statham movie Crank.. excited!!

6 comments:

Sara said...

sorry to hear you are having a rough time. I can honestly say the first year of graduate school was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life! But you will survive it!! And then you will look back and be so proud of yourself.

It sounds like you have some friends in your program, I can't recommend highly enough that you should form a study group for homework in the evenings, I was just chatting two with one of my former study group partners, remembering all the silly things we did for a laugh when it was midnight and we were still doing homework after a full day in the lab, it really made the whole experience so much better. We used to meet for dinner and take turns cooking (good money saver! cooking for 4 people once usually costs less than cooking for 1 person 4 times) and then hunker down with the books.

Hope you have a better day today :)

Sara said...

(dont know how that "two" jumped in there after chatting...)

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you got the package! I'm not used to how long it takes to mail things to the East Coast and was worried it was lost.

You opened the smallest of the presents first...they only get better from there!

- Emily

Anonymous said...

BTW - Thanks for choosing an optimal "crooked nose" photo of me! ;)
- Emily

rcpeters said...

"how you climb up the mountain is just as important as how you get down the mountain. and, so it is with life"

rocking mountian quote

Anonymous said...

Have you opened another package yet?